I’ve been reading through the Old Testament all year (not
consistently enough….I’m only in 1 Chronicles!), and one of the things I’ve
been doing as I read is taking note of the names of God that are used. For
example, one of the first times God is referred to as “Father” is in 2 Samuel 7
when He promises to be a Father to David’s son.
I love that one of God’s names for Himself is Father. It’s
one of my favorites! But I actually want to talk about a different name of God
– one that I have become increasingly grateful for over the past couple of
years: God as Haggo’el (the Redeemer, in Hebrew).
If I remember right, my journey of learning this name
started one day in the fall of 2012, as I sat out in the woods reading through
Psalm 139. I was reading it out loud, my heart echoing ‘amen’ to each truth.
But suddenly, when I got to the verse “Marvelous are Your works, and that my
soul knows very well,” (vs. 14b) I came to a full stop. I couldn’t even read
it, let alone affirm the truth of it in my own life.
It was one of those moments when I realized there are still
areas in my life where I have a hard time trusting God….a hard time believing
that His plan and what He has allowed are good. There are old hurts and regrets
I still hold onto. It was that day I began to realize that I blamed God for
those things.
I wish I had all my journals here with me so that I could go
back and look at those entries. I think it took a couple weeks for me to think
about it and process it…..but I think later in that final JBU year I was able
to go back to that verse and read it aloud, instructing my heart to believe its
truth.
Perhaps that didn’t come until after this next bit. It was
in April of 2013, as a group of us were road tripping back from an academic
conference in Wisconsin, that the above concept took on a more concrete form. I
was reading through Joel at the time, and there in the backseat of the van I
read Joel 2:25, where the LORD says “I will restore to you the years that the swarming
locust has eaten…My great army which I sent among you.” It was like a light of
spiritual understanding went on in my mind.
God had sent the locust. He had allowed—no, He had caused—a calamity to happen to His
chosen people, in this case as a judgment for their sin. But when His people
repented and turned back to Him (2:12-17), He promised to forgive them and to
redeem the loss that they had endured.
During the nearly two years since that day, the concept of
God’s work as our Redeemer has become increasingly real and special to me. Of
course, a major aspect of God’s redemptive work is His sacrificing His Son to
buy us back (to redeem us) from the grasp of the devil. But I believe we can
see from passages such as Joel 2:25 and Romans 8:28 that God’s redeeming grace
does not apply only to eternity future….it applies to our lives here and now as
well.
There have been several times in the past year and a half
when I have been filled with regrets over how the choices I have made have
impacted others or even just my own outlook on things. It was actually thinking
about one of those occasions that has brought on this blog post. As I lay there
last night, tears running down my face as I wished things had turned out
differently, it was the truth of God’s redeeming power that brought peace to my
heart.
That is not to say that God’s redemption means what I did
was right or even good. God’s work as Redeemer also rarely works on my time
schedule! But when choices have been made in the past—when I can’t go back and
undo them, as much as I wish I could—then, after I have repented before God and
men my Father asks me to trust Him. To trust that He will redeem all things for
His glory and for the good of all of His children, in His time and in His way
(see this blog post for more about that).
I may not see the full outworking of that until I stand in
His presence. If that is the case, He calls me to go forward free from guilt,
counting on Him to work all things for good. Even those things that hurt me or
others, that the devil probably laughed with glee over when they happened. BUT
GOD – He takes each thing and uses it in the refining, molding process—and in
the end, every vessel (each one of us individually) will be beautiful.
For He is Haggo'el, our Redeemer.
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